Fastest way to end an argument

Call your significant other the devil. As in: "You are the devil, woman." Guarenteed end of the argument right there. Possibly because your significant other will be laughing so hard that he or she will not be able to fabricate a snappy retort.
The holiday stress is catching up with us at my house, we spent most of the weekend at each other's throats. Hopefully after next weekend things will get back to normal.
Today was a cross training day. I got up early and rode the stationary bike. I don't have patients until nine today, based on that I thought this week would be pretty light, but the rest of the day looks like a mad rush and most of the rest of the week looks busy too. Even Friday. Damn that 5:30pm patient...don't you realize it's the day before a holiday weekend and I don't want to stay late. Curse me for being so flexible with my schedule.