Sunday, August 27, 2006

I never thought I'd be so glad to see Monday

Tomorrow I go back to my regular job. Thank goodness for that. I've spent the past five days at a continuing education seminar. It was very interesting and informative, and I learned a lot of good information that I can immediately put to use in my clinic, but it was pretty much the longest five days I've been through in a long time. I think I'm spoiled by only having to drive five minutes to get to work. It took me an hour the first three days because I was stuck in the middle of rush hour traffic. Today and yesterday the drive was only a forty five minute one though.
I was plenty busy with other stuff too. Friday night we went to the ballgame...Cards v. Cubs, an age old rivalry that is always an interesting time. The Cards took home the W on Friday and also won yesterday afternoon, so we're looking for the sweep tonight! Last night we went to my grandmother's 85th birthday party. Technically this was not a party though, as we just went to dinner and then back to her house for cake. I'd like to say it was fun, but...my brother was there. That sounds horrible doesn't it?
My brother and I have a tumultuous history at best. He feels like he's always been stuck in my shadow and I feel like my parents have always coddled him. He is an angry, angry little man. His interactions with me consist primarily of him trying to bait me into an argument, taking potshots at my self esteem, and constantly telling me that I'm a "stupid bitch". My parents, of course, always pretend not to see the verbal onslaught and constantly make excuses for his behavior, which is absolutely asinine in my opinion.
What it's turned into is a big mess. When I go to family functions, I'm basically silent. I spoke when spoken to, and I try to stay as far out of the conversation as I can, particularly when he's in earshot, as he doesn't even have to be part of the conversation in order to tell me how wrong and uneducated I am. I figure staying silent makes me a smaller target and thereby preserves some shred of my self respect. I realized last night exactly how much I resent my brother's bad attitude and my family's permissiveness of his verbal abuse. So I had a little conversation with my mother, which of course didn't go well...
I guess the good part about having a dysfunctional family is that you learn how not raise your own family when you have one. Silver lining in every cloud, right?

3 comments:

Nicole said...

You're awesome and very educated despite but what your brother might say. And way to go on being the better person.

Running Jayhawk said...

Yikes. That's a rough situation. My brother-in-law and I don't get along whatsoever. It gets ugly. I usually just come right out and bite back...he typically would shut up first.

Want me to take a crack at your bro?

just kidding. But in all seriousness, that really sucks. Way to be the bigger person. His behavior will eventually catch up to him.

Firefly's Running said...

Wow! I have just as bad of family. I am not the one that who gets into the fights. It's my sister and brother. I just have to step out of the way and let them be.