Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Take that, evil neighbor fiend

We have a neighbor who completely sucks. No doubt about it, the man just doesn't have a clue as to how to be a decent neighbor. He's the yokel who planted eight really large pine trees between his yard and ours, (good fences make good neighbors, but since our city has a restriction against fences, trees are the next best thing). Genius planted these trees a year ago and he placed them in four inch holes (the root balls were at least sixteen inches in diameter) and then just mounded dirt up around the portion of the root ball that stuck out of the ground still. He's the same idiot who only stained part of his deck and left the rest unfinished. He's also the same guy who dug a four inch deep trench from the corner of his house where the drainspout empties to the corner of his lot were the sewer is (which borders our yard also). That trench sat there open for at least eight or nine months until the city finally noticed and made him fill it in, at which point he had to pay for a truckload of dirt to fill in the hole. Anyway, I digress.
Yesterday I noticed that his wife was out in the yard with their little boy, who's maybe three or four years old. He was riding a small four-wheeler around their yard and into some of the neighboring yards. I waited until he rode into our yard, at which point I politely asked her to not allow him to ride his four-wheeler in our yard.
Now, before you all go thinking I'm a big meanie, let me just add that I have no problem with the kids in the neighborhood playing in our back yard, as long as we're not using it. I do however have a problem with motorized vehicles that could potentially destroy my grass, leaving a mud hole for my dog to do his business in.
Anyway, I thought that would be the end of the whole situation, oh how naive am I?!?! Today I was taking the dog out to do his business and she came out on their deck and started yelling at me about how I had better make sure I cleaned up after him, as her son had ridden through dog waste yesterday and she was not pleased about this. I apologized and asked if she knew where the waste was, as I would make sure to clean it up and I would try to keep him out of their yard in the future. Imagine my surprise when she told me that the waste in question was in my own yard!
I should have just let things go, but then she started spouting off about how I needed to come clean up his four-wheeler and then the husband came out and started telling me how my failure to clean up the animal waste in my own yard more diligently was bringing their property values down.
I lost it. I unloaded on this man about how he was the last one in the entire neighborhood who should be talking about anyone else bringing down his property values, as his house is the biggest eyesore in the neighborhood and how all the neighbors think he's a lazy turd who needs to get a clue when it comes to finishing projects that he's started. Needless to say, he'll probably try to burn my house down tonight.
In my defense, I'd had a really bad day with a baby who just wouldn't stop crying and refused to nap despite utter exhaustion. Hopefully he'll be embarassed enough to do something about all the half finished shit around his house. If so, it was a rant well directed.


Firefly's Running said...

Those neighbors really have a nerve to complain about stuff in YOUR yard. Maybe they will try to keep their kid out of your yard after your vent. People should learn to think before they speak. Nice job!

Danielle said...

Oh wow...I would've gone off even more than that. I'm sorry, but a stuff in YOUR yard is something they have no right to complain about. I think I'd have a lot to say to them about their child being on my yard...heck, I wouldn't be tolerant about letting the brats be in my yard to play even when I wasn't back there! Some people just don't belong living with the rest of us.

Dr. Stephanie said...

Good for you for letting your neighbors have it! In fact, I'd encourage my dog to crap all over my yard just to strike a nerve with them! Of course, the whole cleaning up thing is tough one to figure out afterwards. But damn, it'd be awesome to know how irritated they were!